I am sorry your going through such a bad time, stay safe, be good and kind to yourself right now.
As far as dark stuff goes, I think we can all take it, and feel we all feel the same, it's awful and bad whats happened, if you can talk and want to then do, get it out you system.
Our darkest times perhaps need to be shared and we will listen and be there for you. Whatever you say, whatever you perhaps can't say. You will be heard here and your pain acknowledged.
I think I can say that no-one here will judge you, think less of you - probably the reverse - it takes courage to open up and 'talk'.
Say what you feel comfortable with saying.
I'm sorry you feel so alone. I know something of that feeling too. A horrible place to be. I ache for you and wish I could make it better. I can't do that but I am thinking about you.
I hope you will say some more soon and find some comfort here.
Please keep posting never be afraid to say how you feel we are all adults we have a choice if we don't want to answer we don't have too I know I have been triggered and reacted hot headedly as usual but I am learning as I hope others will
Don't give up keep it coming someone will be here never be alone
that conflict stuff has been sorted, it was over as quickly as it started, please dont be afraid to post.
you sound as though you really need to talk. it is safe here, we can handle whatever you need to say, it must be so much harder, on its own in your head. tell us and we will listen.