Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
HAVOCA Home -> HAVOCA Message Board -> General -> How do I do it right?
Post Info TOPIC: How do I do it right?
ouchzone


Experienced Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 104
Date:
How do I do it right?
Permalink Closed

Sometimes postings cause others distress because they are on the other side of the fence. I don't know how to handle this when it happens because I need help but am afraid I will hurt the poster if I seek it. I've spent my life on the wrong side of the fence so this is a big problem for me. I couldn't trust myself to post a response recently because I was so distressed I didn't want to hurt the other person who was also very distressed. I still haven't done it but need to.


It happened recently to someone else re religion.


 



__________________
feemarie


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 54
Date:
Permalink Closed

Hi ouchzone,


Im sorry you are having trouble with this, i know that i too often find it difficult knowing what to say for fear of upsetting someone too.  But remember we are all here for the same reason to give support to people but to get support and help too.  That is the wonderful thing about this site.  All you can do is be honest and truthful with your feelings and try not to worry about causing others distress everyone knows that that isnt the intention of a post i think. sometimes posts can be distressing but that is part of healing i think and tho distressing they always help at the same time.


Maybe you could send this other person a personal message instead of a post stating that you dont want to distress but you know what theyre going through.  I think as you are both going through similar it will help you both to be open about it and this person will appreciate it. and hopefully you will both get help thru talking.


just my thoughts, i hope its helped and eased your worries a little bit, you are in  my thoughts.


take gentle care,


fee


x



__________________
segelov


Experienced Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 100
Date:
Permalink Closed

Hi ouchzone


I too find it hard to post, because I do not wnat to hurt others on here, so many experiences that we have all gone through.  But I would hope that we are all caring enough to know that no one here would ever take offence.  The reason that I am here is because we are all on the path of healing ourselves, and maybe that others on the road will help make a difference, and maybe we may also make a difference to others. Not too well put but I hope you can understand.


Every one here is so kind.



__________________
Raindancer


Veteran Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 49
Date:
Permalink Closed

Hi OuchZone,


I know that when i first went online and started using forums to help me i was sooooooo afraid of saying the wrong thing, or that i would say something that triggered someone else. It does hold you back, it holds you back from speaking about the very things that have hurt us the most (So in a sense its just one of those never ending cycles). We're all here for similar reasons, all looking for support...interaction on very emotional issues, so, with that in mind yes, there may be times that someone is Triggered by something you post (but you know, and so do others that your aim isnt to intentionally cause someone distress) its about you releasing some of what causes YOU distress.


Take gentle care


Raindancer



-- Edited by kachariw at 18:52, 2004-09-18

__________________
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.
HAVOCA Home -> HAVOCA Message Board -> General -> How do I do it right?
Tweet this page Post to Digg Post to Del.icio.us


Create your own FREE Forum
Report Abuse 		Powered by ActiveBoard