Feeling Sad and Worthless

jem · Veteran Member

Feeling Sad and Worthless

HAVOCA · Trustee

Jem

I'm sorry you feel like that.

I don't know any of your work colleagues but I imagine they are at a loss for what to do. I get a very mixed reaction when people find out about my abuse. some of them don't know whether to ignore it, talk about it, or skirt around the subject. they might feel they don't want to make things worse for you. It's difficult for people who haven't been abused to know what to do.

You definitely aren't worthless in my eyes. You're part of the team here now and I wouldn't let that change for anything in the world. So when everything else seems down you can always turn to us here at HAVOCA for a safe hug and nice cup of virtual tea.

I feel your pain and I want to share it with you.

Take good care of yourself

Jamie

liz · Experienced Member

Hi Jem

I've just read your message and I ache for you. Feeling alone and kind of abandoned is hard to deal with. In your shoes I would feel the same and in similar situations have felt something of what you're feeling.

As Jamie says I guess part the silence maybe because people don't know how to respond, and instead of doing something 'wrong' they do nothing. In your previous comments you've come across as warm and caring, a sensitive sort of guy - I don't think there's anything wrong with you - though that won't necessarily make any difference.

I'm glad that you felt able to tell us how you feel today and hope you can draw some support and comfort from the people here.

If I worked with you I'd have sent a card, phoned up not just once but regularly to see how you're doing. I might have made a cake as well. I'd want to know what I could do to help.

I'm sorry i can't make it all better but I'm here and I care and maybe that will help a little.

Liz x

amanda · Experienced Member

Hi Jem

I am sitting here with you hoping you are getting my positiveness I am so sorry things are bad for you

At times it is difficult for others to react to our needs and sometimes we react to them not being responsive in the way we wish

You are not worthless I can assure you and I am sure glad you trusted us enough to come here we will support you all the way.

I am not so good on the hugs but Jamies virtual tea sounds good I will drink a cup with you if thats ok

I am even given you a wink and a smile to show I am with you

cannot give you anything else cos I cannot cut and paste sorry

Please take care and post as much as you like

Amanda

amanda · Experienced Member

Hello again Jem

Just to show my gratitude to Jamie as I couldn't send you a card here are some good wishes

hope you will soon be feeling better

amanda

liz · Experienced Member

Hi Jem

You've been in my thoughts since I posted yesterday and I'm just wondering how you are today? Whether you feel any happier and less sad and worthless? I hope that the blackness has lifted a little at least.

You're certainly NOT worthless but can understand so well why you come to that conclusion given your colleagues behaviour.

And the other things I was going to ask you is Why you wanted to be a midwife? I'm interested that's all. An unusual profession for a guy. I think I'd have preferred a a male midwife to some of the female midwives that were around when I had my son.

Anyway, I'm still holding you in my thoughts and hope you will reply and let me know how you are. Take care, be kind and gentle with yourself - easier said than done - I know! and I hope you will soon be able to return to your job.

Liz x