Hi Claudine

I'm not very good with smileys, but you are not alone here. 

I have found it difficult with some of the members of my family, they don't know how to treat me.  Am I safe?  Will I continually harp on about the past? 

I had to give up work, and I decided that I would be truthful about the reason being PTSD and it's cause, as I had had to live so much of my life as a lie.  I found some work colleagues were very supportive, and still keep in contact, but others try to avoid me not knowing how to relate to me.  I am an alien creature, something they have not experience of, and therefore to be avoided at all cost.  At least that's what it feels like to me.

It is in this sort of environment, in contact with people who know and understand, that I know I am not alone.

So be assured that by putting your thoughts here, they will be read and understood.

Hi Claudine

Not too good with smileys but here goes My family didn't abandon me I was worth "too much" to them.

Although I have not lived in that environment for 19 years not a day goes by without me feeling someone is challenging me I have a very fragile network of people because of the issues I have around trust. I am very nieve I have to make a lot of effort in protecting myself and this uses a lot of energy. 

My children when younger would sometimes say I was not like other mums they were not to know I have no personal relationship skills I never learnt any

I think lonliness is a major problem for many of us here your family have probably moved on they probably don't realise that its not so easy for you but keep coming here we are all with you

heres an extra

Take care

Amanda